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By Jane Doe Published December 17, 2013

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Greetings, they call me Ahmadu, the Chief Executive of the Federal Capital Territory.

Hear my story, because I have nothing left to
hide. Of course I took the funds that were originally meant for constructing clinics and classrooms for our children. Rather than paying
contractors for schools and hospitals, I gambled every single naira away on digital slot machines and virtual
poker.
The worst part of this whole mess: my legal wife is threatening divorce.

She is extremely angry and unfair complaining that my
gambling addiction ruined her Dubai luxury shopping trips.
Imagine that! She wanted designer bags and gold watches, while
I was busy chasing jackpots on the internet. She does not
care about the hospitals or schools at all, she only cares about her designer wardrobe.
My side chick is another story, who is equally upset that I can no longer afford.

The root of the problem in our country today: online gambling in Nigeria has gone completely
out of control. Everywhere you look in Nigeria today, young people and foolish leaders
like me are getting addicted to these online
betting platforms. They are the ones stealing our future. They took the money
meant for schools and hospitals, leaving our children to study under
trees, just so foreign casino owners can become billionaires.

Being a brilliant and dedicated public servant whose mind is
entirely focused on keeping my wife happy and treating my lover right, I see no flaws in my leadership.
It baffles me why anyone would call me corrupt or question my financial choices.
I am simply a modern governor enjoying harmless digital leisure.
The real culprits here are those deceptive online casino platforms in Nigeria that clearly cheated me out of my rightful winnings.
If those virtual slot machines had just paid out the jackpot I
deserved, every hospital and school would have been built
twice over, and my wife would already be shopping happily in Dubai.
So let us not point fingers at a dedicated leader like me, instead, let us ban these
online betting apps that stole my money and disrupted my home.

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